To-do lists have a way of never ending.
The completion of one task is only the signal of another’s start. After weeks and weeks of round the clock activity like this, a simple day, where I don’t have to do anything but whatever I please, sounds like paradise. I just want to lie in bed all day and think about nothing. I will say. But the funny thing is, when that day of freedom finally comes, I often don’t know what to do with it.
Unless I’m on vacation in a tropical or foreign place, there is a part of me that can’t just be still.
Even now on my Spring Break, at my childhood home, I feel this need to have something to do every day. It’s quite the contradiction: I dread being busy, but I also don’t like the idea of of having nothing to do.
Time is valuable to me, and so I feel guilty if I’m not doing anything with it. Instead of relaxing when my to-do list runs out, I turn around and fill it up with stuff again. I wouldn’t call myself a workaholic, but I can be preoccupied by making sure I hit each day’s targets and goals.
Amid re-making my list last night, before my week-off from college began, I was taken off guard — overwhelmed with a peace I’ve only ever experienced in Jesus Christ. Be still and know that I am God, and that that is enough. It whispered to me. Talk about a slap in the face.
I’m great at managing my schedule, but my distractions leave little time for God aside from Sunday morning church and Thursday night worship practice.
My inability to put the breaks on life is distracting me from my relationship with God.
Too regularly, I cram every waking minute with something to do, but I keep putting Him on the back burner. Like somehow getting that new sweater I’ve always wanted is more important than spending time alone with God. It’s time for me to stop fearing moments of stillness and start to viewing them as a gift: a gift for alone time with the Lord.
We will never go deeper with Christ if we fill up our daily schedules without giving him the time of day. We should relish in the stillness, because that is where we can meet and rest in Him.
Do you struggle with stillness? How have you learned to embrace it?